Local online newspaper wins July 4th Crow Eating Contest
By: Mark Wayne, Lead Investigative Reporter
Date: July 2022
The City of Louisa held more 4th of July and Bicentennial Events this past weekend. In addition to its Rubber Duck Drop and Hot Dog and Blueberry Pie Eating Contests, the Fiscal Court held a Crow Eating Contest. The Crow Eating Contest was the brainchild of County Judge Executive (CJE) Bill Gardner.
Bill Gardner stated the inspiration came from “Tootie” Vanhoose, who previously held the post of CJE. “Tootie had a rat catching contest back in 1953 because there were too many rats in the town dump and sewers. I always wanted to have a contest like that, and I think we have too many crows in this county. So, we decided to have a crow eating contest. Plus, I thought I had a good chance to win this thing. I mean, name one person you know that has the potential to eat more crow than me.”
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The contest kicked off with many state and local politicians, mothers-in-law, and amateur journalists. Despite being heavily favored, many of the local and state politicians lost to dark horse competitor, The La Visor Laser. The La Visor Laser is Louisa’s only online newspaper source ran by non-native English speakers, as evident by their many spelling and grammar errors. The La Visor Laser is also infamous for their lack of evidence-based reporting, factual inaccuracies, and inability to accurately gender or identify people they report on.
The La Visor Laser released a statement after their victory. “We r relly proud to have won dis contest. We luv eaten crow. Each crow we eated giv us the p’wer n strength n smarts of another crow. One day we wil be full bird braned.”
TIME-OUT FROM COMEDY: Actual Piece of Louisa History
This article was inspired by this photo, which was taken by John G. Zimmerman in 1953. The photo was included in one of his books, “America in Black & White: Selected Photographs of John G. Zimmerman.” He was really creative with his book titles, obviously.
It appears Edgar W. “Tootie” Vanhoose is standing near the area of where the old Methodist Church stands in downtown Louisa. Tootie’s daughter, Doshia, wrote years later that, “When Dad was mayor, the city had a town dump and the sewers ran into the river, which was a haven for rats. Dad contacted a new company called D-CON. The company supplied their product for free advertising. Dad also put a 25 cent bounty for every rat brought to City Hall. The program was a great success for eradication of the Rat Crisis in the city of Louisa.
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