Vioganni’s renovation accidentally destroys beloved Louisa cultural relics
Update: It turns out Giovanni’s sent back a statement that was a resounding rejection of our offer. Whether or not they still have the stained glass lights is unknown, but we hope those glorious lights are happy wherever they are.
Full disclosure, we were going to make a $400 donation in their name to a local charity or cause of their choice. Then we were going to have the beloved lamps auctioned off for some other local charity, once again in their name… but since the plan has fallen through and we still want to donate to charity… we are going to donate $200 to the Northeast Kentucky Community Action Agency (NEKCAA), located at 180 Bulldog Lane, in the name of Dock’s Pizza. The NEKCAA offers life-changing resources to families struggling with food security, transportation, early childhood education, senior support, housing, workforce development, family advocacy, and so much more.
Better news: We are opening up this offer to anyone in the community. If anyone in the community has one of the stained glass lights that used to hang in Giovanni’s, we would love to have it. We will donate $100 in your name to a local charity or cause of your choice. Then we will have the lights auctioned off for a local charity or cause. The offer stands to the community until the timer below runs out. Reach out to us at thebigsandylazer@gmail.com
By: Mark Wayne, Lead Investigative Reporter
Date: August 25, 2022
The newly renovated Vioganni’s in downtown Louisa, KY has came under fire from the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO) for its inadvertent desecration of cultural relics native to the town. It has come to light after an UNESCO investigation that during the renovations the original “BULLDOGS” and “WILDCATS” stained glass overhead lights were unceremoniously dismantled from their original location. The blue and white “WILDCATS” lights, as well as the red and black “BULLDOGS” lights had been given special protection by UNESCO as a World Heritage Site.
“Much like when the Taliban and ISIS destroyed many revered cultural and religious sites across the Middle East, Louisa has suffered a similar fate, unfortunately” stated a UNESCO representative visiting the site, who spoke to us on the condition of anonymity. The official also added, “It is likely important pieces of the cultural history of Louisa, KY will never be recovered and are now lost to the annals of history. Similar to The Ark of the Covenant, they will fade into the realm of myth and legend.”
New Vioganni’s owners Danny and Denny Buck-Meadows released a public statement in light of the UNESCO investigation: “We are cooperating fully with the United Nations and regional authorities in this matter. We are also saddened by the unintentional loss of these beloved town relics, even if the new dining room is more bright and cheerful. In an effort to compensate the town we are now letting people have the option of getting a Pizza Cookie when they order a Party Special at full menu price.”
Mayor Gerrald Jones and County Judge Executive Bill Gardner have announced a joint press conference for later this week to address beefing up security of other beloved cultural landmarks. This is the second known destruction of an iconic Louisa treasure, after the destruction of the “Billy Bob Loves Charlene” graffiti on the old Foodland during a renovation by Area Readdiction Conglomerate (ARC). The Birdhouse has announced a halt to all potential renovations as a precaution, which was fortunately already in line with standing company policy.
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